What A Long Year

I’m writing this with much of an insomnia problem. I hope this would mentally tire me out so I can catch enough rest for work that starts in less than 8 hours. 

I can’t wrap my head around the fact that the new year is coming. I mean new years always scare the shit out of me because it means change. Change has never been my strong point. But I went through a whole lot of change in this past year. I mean it has truly been an extremely long year with unlimited ups and downs. I honestly never thought I would make it to the end.

I started the year with so much unknown. I didn’t know what I wanted to do with my life. I had no plan and no motivation to get myself out of my rut. And here I am. I have a proper job that I love-hate (but mostly love. shh don’t tell anyone.) I am writing more which of course, I love. This is the most I have traveled within a year. I have lots to be thankful for. Alhamdulillah.

I feel like I have slowly reignited my love for travel again. After hitting a few bumps last year, I was able to enjoy traveling and all its unknown. This was the first year I had traveled during the fasting month which was less of a challenge than I thought it would be. It was the first time I had to travel for work which was exciting because I have always wanted to have travel as part of my job. I had an incredible trip to Melbourne which helped me find my focus again. And of course, I had a beautiful (but mediocre) vacation to Spain. I’m ready for my next holiday already!

I got a job. Well, what started out as an almost 3-month internship has now turned into a job. I get that no job is perfect but I enjoy the creative work I am doing here. I mean it’s not my dream but it will do for now. It has really helped me push myself and get my wheels started before I start moving on to the chapter of my life I hope to conquer. Also, I have met a couple of people who have really brought a certain joy into my life. Honestly, I feel more centered now. It’s not all smooth sailing but I’m glad to be working with someone who I am happy to call a friend.

I became an aunt for the third time! Hurray for Layla. Although I don’t get to see her as much I would like to, she has been a bundle of joy and a great latest addition to our happy family. Looks like I finally have a buddy for the family photos now. She is incredibly adorable and I hope she will grow quickly so I can play with her.

I had a long and hard battle with my depression and anxiety this year. The lows were so low that sometimes I wonder if I would ever make it and see the light of a new day. But I’m very grateful for the love and strength I’ve received from the few around me. Though I’m not looking to be cured, I am however coping with it a lot better now. Meditation and faith have really been a reprieve. But it is a battle I have to be ready to fight.

As the year ends, I can hardly remember everything that went on. However, I am glad to report that my year was a big one with all the changes that occurred. I feel like I got to know myself much better. If there is anything my lows and highs have taught me is that I know I can count on myself (with lots of help from God and the people around me) that I can get to the light at the end of the tunnel. It is certainly funny how life turns out. I believe He is the greatest planner of all. I hope to continue to grow and become the person I have envisioned for myself. I hope I am ready for all the change that is to come in the new year. I am ready to work towards my next goal. I am moving into this new year with gratefulness and ready to grow as a person.

xoxo

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